Preparing a Toddler for a New Baby
By Contributing Editor: Pamela Gifford
Toddlers don't understand a whole lot when it comes to getting prepared for an event. They have no perception of time, only the here and now. You can verify this point by telling any toddler that you will go out for ice cream AFTER supper, only to have him believe that you're going now, and thus a tantrum ensues. This lack of time perception makes preparing a toddler for a baby's arrival especially difficult.
You can tell your toddler that you're pregnant or going to have a baby all you want but don't expect any kind of concrete response just yet. Toddlers don't have the ability to comprehend all the complicated stuff that goes along with pregnancy and how a baby is born.
To help him prepare for a new baby, take every opportunity in the coming months to draw his attention to babies you see in public. If possible, do some babysitting for friends and family that have a baby so that he can become familiar with the special needs of a baby.
You can also buy a "life like" baby doll. Show her how to care for the baby, how to change it's diaper, how to feed it, and how to lay it down for a nap. Of course she won't actually be changing her sibling's diaper but if you do it enough on the baby doll, at least she'll know what you're doing when the baby does come.
There are a number of children's books that you can find that will help the idea of a new baby become more real for him. Chose stories about kids getting a new sibling and stories about what to expect from a new baby.
The television is also a valuable resource when it comes to preparing your toddler for a new baby. TLC programs such as "A Baby Story" and "Bringing Home Baby" are excellent ways of demonstrating how a baby arrives and what a baby does after it is born. After watching "A Baby Story" with me one day, my then almost two year old son said, "Baby!" while pointing at the television, then raised my shirt and kissed my swelled belly. While I'm sure he didn't understand all of it, that one sweet action told me he was starting to realize what was going on.
Another way to help your toddler prepare is to let her help pick out baby gear. If she has a say in what goes in the nursery and gets to help make the decisions, then she won't feel so left out of the process.
